Sheer comedic genius.

Jesus Christ: The Musical

This has to be the most brilliant car ad ever:

[Link to video]

If car washes like that really existed, I’d buy a vehicle. I might ever learn how to drive it, too.

Did you know you can make your Mac speak out loud whatever you want via command line? I didn’t.

Here’s how:

1. Open a terminal (Applications>Utilities>Terminal).
2. Type in say eat my balls (or whatever you want, just put “say” in front of it).
3. Sit back, listen, giggle and waste your entire day making your computer say really dirty things.
4. Know you are really, really cool.

You can also have your mac read entire text files by using this command:
say -f PATH/TO/FILE.TXT

Sweet! You may find that for some words, in order for your Mac to pronounce them correctly, you’ll need to spell them phonetically, but whatever…

Type the command man say for the manual on how to use this command and the various options and things you can do with it.

This kid, whether he ends up President or convict, is definitely going to grow up to be somebody special.

A 13 year old from Texas who stole his Dad’s credit card and ordered two hookers from an escort agency, has today been convicted of fraud and given a three year community order.

…Police said they were alerted to the motel by a concerned delivery clerk, whom after delivering supplies of Dr Pepper, Fritos and Oreos had been asked by the kids where they could score some chicks and were willing to pay. They explained they had just made a big score at a “World of Warcraft” tournament and wanted to get some relaxation. On noting the boys age the delivery clerk informed the authorities.

…When police arrived at the motel they found $3,000 in cash, numerous electronic gadgets, an Xbox video console with numerous games, and the two local escort girls.

…Asked why he ordered two escorts, Ralph said he thought it was the thing to do when you win a “World of Warcraft” tournament. They told the suspicious working girls they were people of restricted growth working with a traveling circus, and as State law does not allow those with disabilities to be discriminated against they had no right to refuse them.

…The $1,000 a night girls sensing something up played “Halo” on the Xbox with the kids, instead of selling their sexual services.

…Ralph’s ambition is to one day become a politician.

[Link to full article]

Let me tell you… this Ralph kid has some serious fucking balls. If only I’d known somebody that fucking cool when I was that age.

This stop-motion video of animated graffiti, painted on the walls of Buenos Aires and Baden by an artist named Blu is nothing short of amazing. It’s fucking brilliant, really. It just keeps going, flowing and morphing.

[Link to video]

I’m loving this dance remix of Bill O’Reilly’s F-bomb explosion. It’s pure editing genius:

[Link to video]

Here’s a the original rant/tantrum O’Reilly threw that provided the source material:

[Link to video]

Holy shit…can this kid shred:

[Link to video]

Only 8 years old!

These Virgin Mary urinals Rule! I really, really need one.

I hope that somewhere, out there in the world, there’s also some Jesus urinals as well.

For some reason, I was wondering what the former Vice President of the United States, Dan Quayle was up to. So, to satisfy curiousity, I looked up his entry on Wikipedia, to find it hilariously defaced. Here’s a screenshot:

[Link to larger size]

From the first paragraph:

James Danforth “Dan” Quayle (born February 4, 1947) is an American politician and a former Senator from the state of Indiana. He was the forty-fourth Vice President of the United States under George H. W. Bush (1989–1993), and let me tell you something, this guy gives an amazing head, I’m telling you, you won’t find a better blowjob than the one Dan Quayle gives, it’s just so smooth and hot, and he’s willing to either swallow or to receive a big splash of cum in the face.

Awesome.

Not since R. Kelly has an R&B video cracked me up like this one:

[Link to video]

Awesome!