I was in a really bad mood this morning. Now, now thanks to watching this video several times over, I feel much better.

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Thank you, Nawasye Ahmad Shah Abdali Koni Baba…thank you Pashtun Midget, wherever you are.

I am envious.

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Were I a superhero vigilante, this beast would be my sidekick.

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The video reminds me of Roger from the Tekken series.

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Some days you just have to “WTF” yourself senseless:

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AWESOME! I want hang to with those guys!

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An insanely good and long overdue idea. I’m renting this as soon as it hits DVD.

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So if I shove forks up my ass and down my throat and plug myself into a wall socket, I’ll go heaven and meet the baby Jesus?

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Hmm… Thanks, I’ll have to try that. How’s about you go first?

On some Public Access show, circa 1997:

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In the name of all things holy and true… I really fucking need one of these bastards:

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One could argue that living in Brooklyn, I hardly need one of these bad boys. I beg to differ. A paintball sentry makes you awesome. It makes any place instantly badass. It’s a necessary addition to any paranoid’s household.

This is where I’m at today:

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